My summer vacation

It’s been a confusing time with the quarantine and all. I’ve been reading a lot, and I noticed the other day that my coffee “Chock Full ‘O Nuts” has a sticker on it that reads, “No Nuts.”

I thought this was odd even though I was semi-aware that coffee came from beans and not nuts I wondered why they would name their company after nuts. Well, it seems they started life as a nut company and added coffee later and then they dropped the nuts but kept the name. It makes you wonder if General Electric is still in the electric business or not.

A couple of expressions that are starting to irritate me: “We’ll have to walk that one back.” This means they’ve been caught in a bald-faced lie and will now have to come up with a more plausible lie. The other is: “This is the new normal.” Meaning the old normal is no longer normal, which probably replaced a previous normal. This was thought up by people who insist that “60 is the new 40.” No it isn’t. I’m 70 and I feel 90. This is the new normal for me.

The Talbot County School Board, which is consistently wrong about most things, should name the women’s softball field after Durrie Hayes. Durrie did more to bring women’s softball to prominence both at Easton and Chesapeake College than anyone would have thought. I would say this is a no-brainer, but then I have to consider who I’m talking about.

I watch a lot of television, and I had fallen in love with JoAnne Clendening on “Maryland Farm Report.” She has a beautiful smile and I assumed she was a farm girl. Then I saw her in a commercial for some kind of health deal and I’m angry and embittered at the two-timing vixen. I have switched my affections to Fiona Bruce on BBC’s “Antiques Road.” I do suspect, however, that she may not be British because she’s got beautiful teeth.

I watch the same channels most of time, so I get the same commercials. The late night/early mornings ones concern themselves mainly with health products or hair replacement. There are also a number of them telling me whom to sue for their defective products. These are usually announced by “a non-attorney spokesperson” in order to give them some credibility I suppose. I can no longer stand the Progressive commercials and detest Flo. Not as much, though, as LiMu Emu or Doug.

There’s an odd one I’m fascinated with for engine oil. It has two tiny guys in jumpsuits on a shelf with can after can of motor oil. One of the guys is a famous NASCAR driver. A Chinese-American appearing women is looking at the oil and they make her dance for some reason. She can’t dance. I don’t know if this is racist or not, but it doesn’t seem to have anything to do with selling motor oil.

I’m anxiously awaiting the time the Seattle anarchists notice that there’s a 16-foot statue of Vladimir Lenin in their city. Since he brought death and misery to millions of people, I’m not sure if this is classified as “systematic racism” or not. Apparently not since he remains in place in the People’s Republic of Seattle. In fact, most of these cities that claim “systematic racism” have a black mayor, a black state’s attorney and a black police chief. They are the system.

One of the more humorous events of this silly season is the Democrats parading around the Capitol wearing kente cloths. They had just finished mocking President Trump for walking next door to a church with a Bible in his hand. And then, there they were with pieces of cloth left over from a JOANN Fabric remnant sale to show solidarity with George Floyd. Nancy Pelosi could not get up after kneeling.

Follow me on Twitter @connie_stardem.

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